How to get out of dark moods

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Artwork for How to get out of dark moods
Artwork for: How to get out of dark moods

What a wonderful day this has been so far. Everything feels so different today.

Right now I’m sitting in a park and feel very much at ease. It feels a bit like a heavy cloud, that has been following me around for the last few days, has just evaporated and made room for bright light and warm winds.

What was necessary for me to get out of this “dark mood”?

Step 1 – Notice

First I needed to notice and accept that it was there in the first place. Sometimes that’s actually the hardest step to do, since looking on the inside can feel very dangerous.

So instead I start looking outside of me:

I haven’t really eaten healthy.
I should have worked out more.
I sit in front of a screen too much.

Are those related to inner chaos?
I think they are.

Are they the cause of it?
I think they can be. But not always.

This time they were more like the result, instead of the cause.

I do believe that you can set things in motion on the inside, by changing something on the outside (e.g. start working out more or stop staring at your phone all the time). But at some point you have to face the things that feel so complicated inside of you.

Because if you don’t you might get lost in an endless circle of distracting yourself with “doing healthy things on the outside”.

Does that make sense? It does to me.
I can distract myself beautifully by focusing on super healthy eating or working out all day. Never really having to look at what’s going on inside of me.

So the first step is always noticing and accepting.

Step 2 – A conversation with yourself

Second I needed to do a “brave step forward” and make a commitment with myself to start looking into what’s going on inside me.

Writing helps me a lot in this.

I think because writing something down makes it more “real” and yet it feels much safer that talking to someone other than myself.

Step 3 – A conversation with a witness

Third I needed someone to speak to. This was the final step and it changed a lot. I could almost physically feel my inner atmosphere clear after that. I remember that I couldn’t help smiling, even laughing out loud a bit.

I think by speaking something out loud, what is happening inside of you is laid bare. It’s taken from the shadow and placed (hopefully gently) into the light. And if you lay it in front of another person, a witness, their light shines upon it as well.

This last step can feel scary and hard to do and yet it’s probably the most powerful. Especially if the person you speak to is able to truly “hold the conversation” with you.

That’s all for today.